An Englishman’s home is his castle!

‘In each and every part of Wales I will build a mighty castle!

To prevent the emergence of any upstart, traitorous rascal!’

Edward confers with master builder, James of St George, concerning the intricacies of castle construction.

The aftermath of the unpleasantness in Wales.

Perhaps Edward’s wife, Eleanor, might have asked him about the savage manner of Dafydd’s death. As far as the king was concerned Dafydd’s conduct had created a veritable nightmare. God knows poor, dear Roger Mortimer had died on campaign in Wales trying to deal with the Welsh upstart. Roger’s death had affected him deeply, after all, he had always been totally loyal to the crown. Roger had rescued Edward from Monty’s clutches during the Second Barons War.

 God, damn it man!

Edward exclaimed:

‘Sweet Roger had me freed from Monty’s gilded cage!

Is it any wonder that over his death, I felt an enormous rage!’

The loss of Roger had left Edward feeling immensely anguished. He could only take understandable comfort in the intimate details of Dafydd’s execution. The sufferings caused by the long-drawn out process of castration and disembowelling of the man while he was still alive, would have helped sooth his troubled emotions. Edward’s answer to the Queen consort would almost certainly have  been as follows:

‘My greatest need, my most earnest wish, at that point was a catharsis for my anguish!

For the flocks of birds flying around London bridge, Dafydd’s head must have presented a tasty dish!’

Getting down to business.

Justice had been done as far as the king was concerned, but now it was time to look to the future. Thank God, Wales had been subdued, but Edward had to ensure that the principality stayed under royal control. The only method of ensuring continued dominance was the construction of castles at strategic points across the country. Edward’s father, Henry III had begun this process, but Edward extended the programme with characteristic grim resolution.

‘Thanks dad, you began the Welsh castle building fad!

For the example given, I’m most proud and glad!’

A number of new towns were established where the castles were being constructed and Saxon immigrants were encouraged to settle there. Thus creating English urban enclaves positioned in a potentially hostile countryside. Now Edward had a base of loyal support among the population, and this too would help to preclude the possibility of rebellion.

The king embarked upon a major castle building programme and in this endeavour, no expense was spared. In order to ensure the highest standards of architecture, the master mason, James St George was brought over from Savoy to oversee the whole project. Indeed, James did so with a masterful precision that very much stood the test of time. The fruits of his labour can be seen across Wales to this very day.

Caernarfon castle, which lies besides the Menai Strait, is the most complex fortress built by the man from Savoy. One of its features was the presence of round towers. The new tower design allowed the defenders to deploy their fire with greater accuracy, and therefore inflict more damage on the attackers.

Beaumaris castle on Anglesey was the last item of Edward’s fortress construction programme. One of its features was the carefully constructed arrow slits placed at strategic intervals in the defences.

‘The firing slits in the castle are so, so very narrow!

But this means increased accuracy for each and every arrow!’

Another innovation was the provision of attack holes in the roof above the passageways through which the defenders could pour boiling oil on to heads of the emerging enemy.

‘You brave warriors gained entry to Beaumaris through practised armed skill and hard, bloody, backbreaking toil!

But all you got in return was a melted head and torso, courtesy of our own homemade, specially concocted boiling oil!’

Beaumaris castle -featuring the moated north-western defences.

Edward’s measures to deal with what he regarded as unreasonable behaviour by the Welsh were largely successful. Wales remained peaceful for a century or more. The king was content, and he now felt confident in turning his attention to another part of the Celtic fringe, Scotland.